Monday, July 27, 2009

Lover's past.

We were the star cross lovers of old.
Making love in fields of galaxies as
if we were trying to rebirthing humanity.
I was love
You were life.
We were everything and anything that sounded like beautiful.
We would play in Milky ways
Holding our breath as if the heavens
were trying to steal our names.
Because it was…
Time just wanted to take back our joy because
it was jealous of our morning glow.
But I guess you let her win, cause we began to change.
Venus became your lover to feed your beast of lust,
but you were never satisfied.
You consumed every planet that would open its legs
and you never stopped searching for more.
We grew tired of holding our ever breaking bond,
But I never thought you would let go,
Without so much as giving me a net to fall into
I have been watching you,
bouncing through constellations as if you
thought I would take joy in chasing you,
but I am tired of running.
The trails of your absence are so beautiful
that I have forgotten to morn your passing
I know you are not dead but I know that we are
and performing CPR on still lungs has left me exhausted.
I planted my feet firmly in soil that still harvest my pain
but at the same time using these
callused hands to hold a once mended heart,
broken far too many time to find the pieces to make it whole again.
I have started looking for your stardust in day skies,
Hoping you left some pattern of your goodbye this time.
Your luminosity that I once revered,
Now lies in darkness , hiding from me
as if you were playing hide and go seek with the sun
I attempt to forget the gaping hole you left into
my once clear night sky but
I will always feel vacant.
So, give me back the 9,184 nights that you hid
the light of the moon from me,
the 700 I’m sorry’s that are just as
worthless as the day you said them,
the 200 I love you’s that regurgitated from your lips
and rest with pleasure in the back of my throat
and the 1 mind that I have lost
but will reclaim again soon.
Soon you will no longer see my star shine so bright
or be able to cast stones in the image of my manifestations.
I will dance by sunlight,
bath in its warmth,
smile at blue skies and
finally understand the conversations of clouds.
As soon as figure out how to I let you go.

My City.....

My city is on fire,
and I have doused it with so much kerosene
that I am afraid that I have incinerated her soul.
There is no heaven for our concrete angles,
don’t worry I have goggled it.
Searching for lost souls only comes up
with ones that didn’t want to be found
in the first place.
She keeps gasping for the air
that I am trying to save out of her,
she is not taking her salvation well,
This is my gift, weighed in as my curse.
Making me her grim reaper,
but everyone must play their part.
She will not be an exception to execution,
there will be no laugh reels
just tears to marking the end of her blinding pain
this will be her forced peace,
resting in between aborted dreams and misplaced prayers,
both she could never hold tightly to.
Putting her back together will be punishable by death,
her death will be vital.
Besides, I love it when she is melting,
Her smoke reminds me of freedom
Infernos rise from her wings touching my heart
and I need to believe that this is for the best.
She thinks that I hate her but little does she know
that my signs of cruelty are to save the city
that I remember being my home.
I can no longer stand idly by as they continue
to build skyscrapers in her downtown
and call her price of living reasonable.
Change her Ghettos to Urban Living and call it progress.
making what she thought was weird into commercial.
I would rather her become a burnt sacrifice to the Gods
than some rich man’s bitch.
For those who see me standing here
with burnt matches
I dare you to judge me.
You are not there when her tears become so much
that they have washed away the
things that her hands have made.
Constantly standing at the witches stake to prove her innocence.
Tell me how you would feel to watch your only friend become a victim of money
Watch as they drill holes in her core and plant roots of instability
She is already dying, I am just making sure that she
has enough soul left to remember what heaven looks like
So I finally release you, look away from this world
and remember the good times.
Remember when you use to be home.

Friday, July 24, 2009

Let me say my thank you's before the blood bath begins.

OK so in 10 DAYS marks the beginning of Nationals and I have a feeling that things are going to get ugly ( not with me cause i am just happy to be performing but you know poeple dont think like me) and I just wanted to tell my friends, family, poets, poet family and anyone else that I have met on this journey that I love you.. and thank you for helping me be the person/poet/performer that I am. So here I go:

1. God: Thank you for life and the one you blessed me with. You have never left my side even when I doughted your existence sometimes. You have been my bestfriend and thank you for giving me enough time to relize that.. I no longer base my faith on my mother's but my own. Thank you for making me stronger.

2: Mother: You have been my rock long before I was born. Thank you for embracing everything that I have tried to do in my life and you never once tried to limit me... I love you from the core of my soul and you know that whatever you need i am there... no questions just love. tear.

3: Rendy, Brittany and Nikki: I think out of everyone you three have seen me change the most. Thank you for loving me through all of my changes. I hope that I have made you proud to be called your friend. From cribs to grave I will always be there for ya'll.

4: Trae: you have been the best boyfriend that I could have asked for. You loved me when I couldn't find love in myself. you are a beautiful man and I am so blessed to have you in my life. Loving you has made me better... thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you... I love you... tear.

5: NEO SOUL FAMILY: So where do I begin, thank you for letting my find a home in this family. We have had our ups and downs but that is what family is. Love you and thank you for being my backbone.

6. Killeen Poetry Slam Family: So you have been my heros from Day 1 and always showed me love. I know I talk alot of noise... but i would love nothing more for final stage to be full of TEXAS!!!!!!! GO IN.

7. Shay: You have been my sister and bestfriend... i love you... ( i cant write anymore cause I am really crying and I am at work... no bueno)

8. Brandon : Thank you for helping me hold on when I wanted to quit. I will always love you for that...

9. Urban Word: You are amazing... my jaw drops everytime I hear you all perform.. but most inportant you are beautiful people and that is not a easy thing to find these days.. you have helped me find my voice... i love all of you.. thank you for everything.

10: Jadon/ Hasan/ Joshua and other people that I have met at BNV: DOPE DOPE DOPE!!!!! Thanks for the laughs and the real talks. you are great people... really really would cut for you ...

11: U21 SLam TEAM: You are the most amazing woman that i have met and you have just started your journey... I cant wait to see what will happen next.

12: Tova: I love you and even though you feel alone sometimes you are not... look at this message everytime you fee sad and see how many poeple love you.... I am finally realizing that you are beautiful and I will always be there for you.

13: Anyone else I missed: please forgive my mind beause you are always in my heart.. see you after Nationals...

Love Always T.

The Official TV Commercial for the 2009 National Poetry Slam!!!

Thursday, July 23, 2009

From BNV and beyond.

So I just came back from BNV ( Brave New Voices to all those that have been a hole for the past year) which was held in Chicago, IL. These are all my opinion so if you get mad ... I really dont care. ( That has been my attitude lately). So I am going to start with the positive... The Program Driector Workshops were GREAT!!!!!... I learned alot and met some great people that are in the same mindframe as me ( to change the world, one youth at a time). The poets that I have met have truly changed my life. I thank you all for being so helpful on my journey. ok so to the stuff that I didnt like... SLAM ... SLAM... SLAM.... !!!!!!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!!! So here is to explain my anger. Slam is not for the weak of heart and in this slam game, anything can happen which includes cheating and things just not being fair. When you get into slam you are told that its not about the point but the poetry... and I think that is a load of crap. If it was all about the poetry and not the point then what is the point of slam and If you are trying to make a point with the youth that EVERYONE's words are important than you would not have SLAM be the Focus of the Festival and you would have Open Mics all week. I saw a YOUTH salm get ugly and look alot like NATS ( when I go the West Palm Beach.. this will be my first nationals... but I know people and competition so... I know how nats is going to go) My babies from NEW York were treated like trash and people can say what they want, those kids have feeling and I have never seen artist pour out their hearts on a stage like that... ( in my eyes the semi final bout with Urban Word, Leeds, Seattle, and Ft. Laurderdale was my FINALS.... real talk. I love SLAM and the point matter just as much as the poetry to me, if you get your feeling hurt because of SLAM then there is always a open mic waiting for you... For all the people that participated in BNV and have no idea what I am talking about then too bad for you.. for everyone else you know what happened and I will always protect mine.... even if it from others that are suppose to be their protectors. ANYWAY.... now that is off my chest. I have one more week until Nationals. I am so happy that it is around the corner. My team are truly God sent.. I love every last one of them... I am so proud to call them teammates and friends. I dont think that they will ever know how much I love them... really. anyway I have to get back to work.. but keep your pen hand strong and look for Team NEO Soul in Florida. love T.