Sunday, January 25, 2009

My thoughts about love.. kinda

I tried to call you yesterday, but there was no answer.
I tried to call you yesterday, but there was no answer.
I tried to call you yesterday, but there was no answer.
So I stopped calling.
I stopped stalling.
Stop pausing the pulses in fake designer purse.
I can’t pretend anymore,
I can’t stop my constant shores.
So in an effort to get your attention,
I have been silently screaming for you to say ….
But I have always been ready for nothing,
seems like I have just been built
to watch from a distance.
Peeking through seared lashes to show
that my love is not a fantasy,
but factually present in our ever changing world.
I have reached through concrete confections to
find that sweeten times are not at the end of
my rainbow and wedding isles and straw
piles can’t keep me safe. So I have been
sleeping in between lovers dreams
that will never come true. Wrapping forgotten
mothers doubts around my womb, to keep aborted
children’s imagination alive because they are
better to handle rejection than me.
I have even gone as far as to take
the stars from your eyes to map out
the course to your heart quickly,
waiting for you to say go.
Though I am ready for your positive,
I am ready for our negative.
His looks kill,
but I have been dying for his death sentence,
making ticks in my cell wall to show my persistence.
I have never wanted a last meal so bad.
But you say that I am not ready for my
execution and I have accepted that.
I have never been one to speak in
circles but this merry go round
suite my present state of mind.
Wind blowing my hair clearing
pathways to my ears to hear the
receiver be your calling card.
No longer am I in the shadows of jaded lovers,
but finally free that you are not worth it.
I stopped calling you yesterday because I got my answer.

strength is disgusting

mistakes are the only thing worth trusting

So this is what happen to me... I mean this is not me but this is what I went through,...